Beer check list

Staring at a long beer menu, Paul tries to decide what to order.

Paul: So, how do I know which of these beers are the good ones?

Max: Here, try my beer checklist. With a few simple questions and rules of thumb you'll know what to order.

Paul: "TV or billboard ad? -> Crap. Sold in a regular store? -> Too commercial." Hey, this sounds like your music checklist... ("If it's in the charts it can't be good!") which always recommends some obscure Scandinavian black metal bands nobody has ever heard of!

Max: Exactly! So we know it'll pick artisanal craft from a sea of commercial swill!

Waiter: What can I get you guys?

Max: Halls of frozen north ice bock!

Paul: Wintersun imperial stout.